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Ligma Johnson has done some atrocious things in his time, most of which happened in his youth when he worked on a popular cruise line frequented by British passengers.

These are his stories, which reveal the debauchery and ugliness of life working at sea.


These stories come from a time when drinking was rife amongst the crew of most ships. The rules stated that you weren’t allowed to have more than two units of alcohol in your system at any time, but people like Ligma would consume two unites ever ten minutes. This drinking culture and mentality was the very thing that aided in sinking the Costa Concordia.


It appears now that this attitude and behaviour exhibited in this book no longer exists, or at best is better hidden then the “glory days” where such behaviour was blatant and in your face.


Snow flakes and woke people should not read this as they are guaranteed to shit a brick and “spack” out on the floor foaming at the mouth while spluttering the words “You can’t say that!”


So sit back and relax, read this book at work, on the train or in school and laugh out loud when some nastiness comes to light or some foul humour happens. Enjoy! 

Chas Bruford, his wife Ellie, and their young daughter Aurora move into Caernarvon Crescent, only to quickly encounter a troublesome neighbor. This neighbor, who never misses an opportunity to remind Chas that she’s lived in her house for over fifty years, soon becomes a constant source of irritation. From the moment the Brufords arrive, their new adversary is determined to make their lives miserable. What begins as petty bickering soon escalates into full-blown animosity, leading to a mutual disdain that ignites an all-out neighbourhood war. Chas soon realizes this isn't just any neighbourhood squabble; it's "the great war" The ultimate battle to end all neighbourhood conflicts. 

This book came together because Ligma is notoriously bad at remembering where he saved his files. This resulted in a number of short stories missing the deadline for “The Misadventures of Ligma Johnson” as well as a number of poems from “Verses of the Unseen.”

This book has four sections:


So sit back and enjoy this copy of “Serious Roger.” 

“Verses of the unseen” is a collection of poems and modern sonnets written by our staff writers from Defiant Publishing.

This unique collection is the result of many years of writing on scraps of paper, the little slithers of space in notebooks and long forgotten notes on mobile phones.

This book is split up into six sections:


All sections are written from the heart, and are honest expressions of the staff writer’s emotions at the time. Some poems, especially those written by our staff writer Ligma Johnson experiments where he felt the need to bring sonnet back into modern writing.

Ligma wrote the vast majority of the poems in this book, which is purely a symptom of his procrastination over writing projects manifesting as constructive work – even though these notes of thoughts lay unseen for years, up until now……………